Why are you doing this?

I thought waiting for you is a bliss.

Now, you’re ignoring me.

I’m in an immense misery.

I thought you love me.

But I think, the one you love is she.

Please tell it to me soon.

Because my life is now half-ruin.

Let me be free with the truth.

I will forget you as soon as I could.


Heaven knows how bitter I am.

This was a lyric from Orange and Lemons’ Heaven Knows (Angel has flown). I’ve been pondering some time about how I would be happy with my current situation in life. I guess asking other people of what to do is not the answer. They can give me lots of ideas but I can never do it myself. Easier said than done, i may say. I am the only one who can understand myself and I am the one who can help myself. Friends are just there to back us up. But whatever, I am still finding my own way to cope up to this situation. I am still sad but now I am loving myself more, so I am barely breathing. I don’t even know why love needs the right time too. I am just afraid of coming to the right time but without the right love anymore. I am afraid of being left behind again. I am afraid of everything that could hurt me. Who isn’t? Please pray for me. I hope I’ll get by.


On an idle day, I usually sleep. It’s my own getaway from the pain I’m feeling because you. But now, I couldn’t sleep either because you also infiltrated my peaceful dreams and now a nightmare. I am halfway in wanting to sleep and wanting to wake. Where can I possibly put myself into? I hate this feeling. I hate the pain. I hate whenever my tears flow uncontrollably. I hate it when I remember you because I always do. All the things surrounding me, keep reminding me that you exist. That we exist. That we never worked out. That you left. That I’m left behind. That you moving on with your life. That I can’t even make a single step forward. That I still love you.

A Game

A game in which everyone’s willing to play

A game without amusement or recreation usually played on a sunny day

A game where victors have eternal bliss

Whilst underdogs receive multitude hiss

A game of gambling life and death

Full of ambiguity, hesitation and Russian roulette

Pain is the ultimate aftermath of this

Some can die without knowing what happiness is

It’s sad to know that only few found truth

Because others’ been blinded; had already become brute

Caveat! Hoax is in this reality game show

A game called love, now you know




Please do come back.

What could I possibly do

Other than letting you go?

I know you love me, too

But your family doesn’t. So

I bid farewell now

Though my heart throbs so hard.

The now and forever vow

has been broken. I’ve been barred.

It’s a painful undertaking

we are doing. But

if we succeed, the sequel resulting

is definitely worthy of the shot.

I will wait for you

’til forever, I guess

Just promise me you’ll come back

and my heart will know happiness.